Monthly Archives: February 2009

Teacher says…

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What has Amy Winehouse done now! (?)

onionmagazine_archive_129a-winehouseOriginal URL = http://www.theonion.com/content/magazine/things_amy_winehouse_mumbled

Welcome to Laffs at Life – where everyone is a friend – See New Entries Below This Sticky Post

Jeff Nix's Facebook profile

Laffs at Life doubles as a test blog and my answer for the near-uselessness of Facebook.         Sticky Post – NEW stuff below

People said, “are you on facebook” and until Jan of 2009 I had NO idea what that even meant. Then came the business blog task, a facebook account and a logical next step…this practice blog was born. 

So how does Facebook *Really* make you feel?  I mean really… I’m 40 (something) and I don’t quite get it… admittedly it is a GREAT procrastination tool – and it’s interesting to see what my actual friends are up to (sometimes) but do I really care about knowing that one of my “friends” is making adjustments to the zig zag attachment on their sewing machine?  

 

While I do see a practical application for exploring the aspects for cross pollinating with business interests, for the most part, Facebook is just goofy. This inclines me to then elaborate on the goofiness quotient by elevating this aspect to its logical highest potential.   

 

Since I’m kinda lost on the real values of FB, I have now converted my FB profile into an occasional, if not daily posting place for my personal brand of off beat humor. So there.. that’s my grand purpose for FB… Enjoy!

 

Jeff Nix (facebook me!) – and read my ABOUT page too!

 

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Size Does Matter

title-sizedoesmatter2

Size Does Matter
 

 

 

“Welcome to Burgerama may I take your order?”

“Yeah, give me a Double Cheeseburger combo to go.”

“Would you like to super-size that for only 39 cents?”

“Sure.”

“Would you like to extra-super-size that for another 39 cents?”

“Huh?”

“Would you like to extra-super-size your meal for 39 cents?”

“Didn’t I just do that?”

“No, you only super-sized it.”

“There’s more?”

“For another 39 cents, you can get a 32 oz. soda and Mondo-sized fries.”

“What am I getting now?”

“A 24 oz. Soda and Bigman-sized fries.”

“24 oz.? That’s super-sized? That sounds like a medium.”

“We don’t have mediums, sir.”

“You don’t?”

“No, sir.”

“How many sizes of sodas do you have?”

“We have 3.”

“OK, give me a large.”

“That’s only 16 oz.”

“I thought it was 32 oz.”

“That’s not the large.”

“You have a size larger than a large?”

“It’s Mondo-sized!”

“Look, you have three sizes of drink. You have your smallest drink, your medium-sized drink, and your largest drink. Small, medium, large. Give me the large.”

“The large size is the small size.”

“OK, then give me the small.”

“We don’t have a small size.”

“16 oz. seems pretty damn small to me.”

“That’s the large.”

“Look. I want the size of soda that will give me the greatest amount of actual liquid in the cup.”

“We have large, Bigman and Mondo.”

“Bigman is larger than Mondo?”

“No. Mondo’s the biggest.”

“OK, give me a Mondo.”

“Do you want Mondo fries?”

“Are they based on the same naming conventions as the sodas?”

“Yes, sir.”

“Let me ask you this. If I ordered a simple Double Cheeseburger Combo, and super-sized it. What would I get?”

“One Double Cheeseburger, Bigman fries and a 24oz. Soda.”

“And that’s super-sized?”

“Yes, sir.”

“So a normal, everyday Double Cheeseburger Combo is, like, a kiddie’s meal?”

“No, the Children’s Special Value Meal comes with Bigman fries and a 24 oz. soda.”

“The kiddie’s meal is bigger than the regular adult combo?”

“Uhm… yeah.”

“How much is it?”

“20 cents more than a regular combo.”

“But it’s the same size as a super-sized combo, which is 39 cents more?”

“Yeah.”

“Can I have a Kiddie’s meal?”

“You want a super-sized combo? Sure.”

“No, I want the Kiddie’s meal, which is the same thing, but 19 cents less. Plus a coloring mat.”

“You can’t have a Children’s Special Value Meal.”

“Why not?”

“You’re an adult.”

“So I have to spend more money?”

“…yes.”

“Tell you what. Here’s a five-dollar bill. Why don’t you give me as much food as you can for this five dollar bill.”

“Uhm.. OK. Do you want to super-size your order for another 39 cents?”

“Sure.”

“OK. One moment.”

Original Source – From our good humor friends at TheBrunching Shuttlecocks – http://www.brunching.com/sizedoesmatter.html

Statistics don’t Lie!

 

 What does this recent statistic poll really say about facebook

 

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 Image Original Source: http://www.theonion.com/content/statshot/why_arent_we_on_facebook

 

 

 

 

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